Knitting With Dog Hair

Just don't get it wet, it will smell awful.

Knitting With Dog Hair

Litter House

I guess cats forgot about shitting where you live.

Litter House

NoPoPo Eco Water-powered AA Batteries

I think I'd rather just buy new batteries instead of peeing into them, just sayin'. 

NoPoPo Eco Water-powered AA Batteries

Breastfeeding Doll

We know, we know, breastfeeding is the best thing for your baby. Come on though, this thing is f'ing weird. 

Breastfeeding Doll

Hovering Vacuum

Now where is my flying car and hoverboard? Mr. DeLorean and Mattell I'm looking in your direction... 

Hovering Vacuum

UFO Detector

If Giorgio Tsoukalos is on your holiday gift list, we've got you covered. 

UFO Detector

ElectraStim Intimidator Electro Butt Plug

Yes, you read that right, Electro Butt Plug. Who buys this stuff? One of you guys apparently... I'm not going to name names (because I can't see who bought it) but someone who was browsing our site jumped on to Amazon to snatch-up one of these bad boys (albeit a slightly smaller one than linked here, have to show some restraint I guess). Now, I don't understand butt plugs, ( I swear I don't : | ) it just doesn't seem comfortable (at all). But to then add electricity to said butt plug adds another level of insanity. So, whoever it was out there that bought this, we salute you. Just please don't use this in the bath/shower, we want you around to buy more expensive butt plugs from us.

Mr-S-Leather ElectraStim Intimidator Electro Butt Plug

Winkers

Do you not feel like enough of an attention whore? Boy oh boy do we have the thing for you. Winkers are pants that have eyes on them, so you can use your fat ass to wink at people staring at your fat ass. Maybe the best part is you can't actually buy jeans from them, you have to send them jeans to ruin paint their trade mark winkers on. My personal favorite has to be the ducks (and my favorite part of the ducks is the "quack!") because when I'm staring at a chicks ass all I usually think about is ducks.

Winkers

p.s.

Here is another pair of jeans for when they ruin yours: sorry about your pants

p.p.s.

Holy shit, I just went to the "order" page so I would be able to put in the price range for these. Do yourself a favor and check out how much it costs to destroy winker your favorite pants

Throwback Friday: Flowbee

Putting a vacuum cleaner at the end of some barbering tools sounds like an awesome idea. Hair is gross, even if it just came off your own head, so who would want it all over their floor? What's not a great idea? Trying to make a kit to cut your own damn hair. Let's face it unless you are shaving your head it isn't going to look good. And by good I mean when you walk down the street someone doesn't say, "Holy shit, that guy cuts his own hair." The guy that invented today's product, The Flowbee, has somehow convinced over 2 million people that they can do their own hair at home and make it look good. Those two million people were hoping for their haircuts to come out awesome, as seen below:

"Hello Ladies"

1,999,999 of those haircuts came out like this:

"Well, back to doing meth"

Oh, and did I mention this thing is over $100 bucks? 

Flowbee

Playmobil Security Check Point

Did you and your kids enjoy your trip through airport security last summer on your way to Grandmas?  Now your family can re-create the non-stop fun of the TSA attempting to pat down little Cindy at home with the Playmobil Security Check Point. Your kids will have hours of laughs racially profiling their other toys while Barbie looks on in fear of the inevitable strip search. Don't make your kids declare jihad on you, buy them the Playmobil Security Check Point today!

Playmobil Security Check Point

Hotdoll

That's right, a sex toy for your dog. It comes in white or black and can be yours for only $200! So, if you are over humped legs, inanimate objects and other real dogs, this might just be the thing for your pooch. Just be careful it doesn't turn into a Lars and the Real Girl type of situation.


B====D  Hotdoll