Instant Irish Accent Breath Spray

Top O' The Mornin' To Ya! I'm assuming this tastes like whiskey and vomit. 

Instant Irish Accent Breath Spray

Money Soap

At least the stripper asshole will be cleaned off of it.

Money Soap

Cigarette Pencils

Now you can combine your addictive love for cigarettes with your love of chewing on pencils.

Cigarette Pencils

How to Pee Standing Up: Tips for Hip Chicks

Just get this instead

How to pee standing up

Sneaky Leaker

Piss anywhere and potentially everywhere (if the reviews are correct)

Sneaky Leaker

Boyfriend Pillow

Better than a pillow that just pokes you with its dick. 

Boyfriend Pillow

AeroShots

Don't forget you took this before you get to the office in the morning and have your 1st cup of joe or you might be able to smell sounds.

AeroShot

Fetus soap

"What's more pure than a fetus?"

Touche Fetus Soap website

Fetus Soap

Scientific W43014 Testicle Self Exam Model

Don't these usually come free with the purchase a dildo?

3B Scientific W43014 Testicle Self Exam Form

Man to Man: Gay Attraction Body Mist

Damn! No longer available! 

Man to Man : Gay Attraction Body Mist

Yoda Bong

Get high you will

Yoda Bong

Tenga Egg

Jack off eggs. You can't make this stuff up people.

"Get different strokes from different yolks"

Tenga Egg

Play-Doh Cologne

Probably doesn't taste as good as the real stuff

Play-Doh Cologne

Poop Shaped Hand Soap

I can't even think of a shitty joke for this...

Poop Shaped Hand Soap

Nose Shower Gel Dispenser

Does this remind anyone else of Double Dare? I bet Mark Summers has one of these in all of his showers. Or maybe he his crippling OCD prevents that. Pretty sad when you think about it...

Double Dare!

Nose Shower Gel Dispenser

Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer

Hey, I just met you,

and this is crazy,

but here's my number

call me "Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer"

Facebook Shower Curtain

Mark Zuckerberg has one of these in all 12 of his bathrooms. 

Facebook Shower Curtain

Black Toilet Paper

How are you supposed to know when you're done?

Black Toilet Paper

Outrageously Expensive Candle

Uh oh, hide your wallets it looks like one of our favorite designers Kiki de Montparnasse (Dildo Chess) is at it again. Now we have a tiny votive candle (hey shutup, everyone knows what that is, right?) with an aphrodisiac-based fragrance for only $65.

You know what’s a better aphrodisiac than a $65 Boudoir Candle? 47 fish sandwiches, a box of fine wine, and a copy of Ghost from the $5 bin at Walmart.

Five-Pound Fat Replica

Just in case you wanted to spend $83.95 to know how much 5 lbs weighs. 

Five-Pound Fat Replica