Showing posts with label Pets. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pets. Show all posts
Spider Catcher Trap and Release No Harm to Bugs!
Would you help a burglar find the front door to your house? Spiders are trespasser and deserve to die. Get off my lawn!
Spider Catcher Trap and Release No Harm to Bugs!
Hot DOG Sausage Links Dog Leash
In actuality this is an "after" picture of walking fido through china town.
Hot DOG Sausage Links Dog Leash
Canned Unicorn Meat
You know what? Of course this is stupid and fake (orly?) but people still buy it. People have spent money their on this. I have a business model for anyone enterprising enough. Buy this, get your printer fired up, and undercut other people selling Canned Unicorn Meat on amazon for say, $8.99. You could make like $3-4 bucks (depending on how much you value your labor, it wouldn't make sense for me (because my time is so valuable) which is why I put it on the internet for someone to steal) per can. Hell, maybe even expand your business later. Bigfoot Meat, Dragon Meat, Loch Ness Monster Meat (might have to take a loss on that selling for about three fidy) the possibilities are endless.
Poop Freeze
Poop Freeze appears to be the aftermath of a crappy movie night consisting of Envy and Batman & Robin. I imagine the "inventor" of this product somehow miraculously made it through Envy without commiting suicide and thought to himself "Vapoorizer is a hell of an idea, but how can I make it real?" Then he popped in a copy of Batman & Robin, that Netflix "accidentally" mailed him, and he comes to the conclusion that maybe there is a movie worse than Envy and that he could just freeze the poop and it would almost be as cool as Vapoorizer. Unfortunately for him someone has already concieved the idea of Poop Freeze, but they call it Duster and you just have to turn the can upside down to freeze shit.
Poop Freeze - The "coolest" way to be your dog's bitch!
eYe2eYe Wearable Hummingbird Feeder
Goats in Trees Calendar
Calendars are always a
Or at least Goats being Assholes 2013
Rear Gear - Pet Anus Covers
Rear Gear! It's a cover for your pet's anus. I wanted to make a witty review but after I noticed "No More Mr. Brown Eye" was their slogan I couldn't focus anymore because I was hearing No More Mr. Nice Guy from Alice Cooper in my head. So I've included the remix instead (Spoiler Alert: I've only changed the chorus because I'm lazy and not creative). Enjoy ... sorry if the chrous gets stuck in your head too.
My laziness makes me sad too, Alice.
I used to be such a sweet, sweet thing'Til they got a hold of me.
I opened doors for little old ladies,
I helped the blind to see.
I got no friends 'cause they read the papers.
They can't be seen, with me and I'm gettin' real shot down
And I'm feeling mean.
No more Mister
No more Mister Cle-e-e-ean
No more Mister
They say, he's sick he's obsce-e-e-ene
I got no friends 'cause they read the papers.
They can't be seen, with me and I'm gettin' real shot down
And I'm, I'm gettin' mean.
No more Mister
No more Mister Cle-e-e-ean
No more Mister
They say, he's sick he's obsce-e-e-ene
My dog bit me in the leg today
My cat clawwed my eyes
Mom's been thrown out the social circle
And dad has to hide
I went to church, incognito
When everybody rose, the Reverand Smith,
He recognized me,
And punched me in the nose
He said,
No more Mister
No more Mister Cle-e-e-ean
No more Mister
He said, you're sick, you're obsce-e-e-ene
No more Mister
No more Mister Cle-e-e-ean
No more Mister
He said, you're sick, you're obsce-e-e-ene
Pet Peek Dog Window
I bet you're tired of your dog being quiet while roaming the back yard. If so do I have the thing for you! The Pet Peek is a window for your fence so your dog can make sure it goes ape-shit every time anything strolls by your yard. According to the news/media section of the site this window "is often referred to as 'simple genius.'"(probably by the inventor). I guess it is a cheaper solution if you want to take pictures of animals close-up with a wide angle lens?
O The Pet Peek O
Throwback Friday: Pet Rock
This is definitely a product that epitomizes the American dream. That's right the lowly Pet Rock pretty much sums up our country. How you may ask? First, it’s ridiculous, some may say stupid. “It’s a rock, who would buy that?” The United States, that’s who. According to Wikipedia (where I get all my facts) the creator of the Pet rock was named Gary Dahl. He was an advertising exec who basically heard his friends complaining about their pets shitting everywhere and wanted to make something no one could bitch about. This idea was so “stupid” that Gary sold 1.5 million of these things… Let me say that again, One. Point. Five. Million. The Pet rock fad only lasted about 6 months but this guy became a millionaire. If that isn’t the American dream my friends, I don’t know what is.
p.s. you can now get an usb powered Pet Rock. Enjoy.
American Dream
Flexi-Mat Corp Pet Pocket
Was it always your dream when you grew up to get a cool dog? To run on the beach and throw toys in the water for a golden retriever? To have a dog that would be loyal and a good friend until the end...
Do you feel like an a-hole for letting your wife talk you into buying that chihuahua? If you already went that far you might as well look like a bigger jackass and get yourself one of these. The Flexi-Mat Corp Pet Pocket could be just the thing for your new life as a whipping boy. Maybe next time you will tell your wife to get back in the kitchen where she belongs. Seriously though, you look like a kanagroo... stop it.
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PooTrap
Hotdoll
B====D Hotdoll
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